Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Mad Bucks Waiting - Can You Help?

Crystal McKee is a magnificent writer. Perhaps you already know this? She is listed on my sidebar, and her blog is called Boobs, Injuries & Dr. Pepper.

The reason I mention her here is because her latest series, The Crazy Chronicles, is a goldmine. All it needs is someone willing to work it. And I figure that maybe one of you might have the tools to do so.

The story she tells is both comic and tragic. It is comic because of her tremendous sardonic wit. It is tragic because, well, it's tragic. But Crystal is able to tell her amazing tale without sinking into overt whining. Above all, it is a story that should inspire. How anyone could live through such hideous things, and come out on the other end without spending the rest of her life boring hell out of people via self-pity, is astounding. That she can tell the tale with panache, and a huge dose of black humor, is miraculous.

This story should be making her mad bucks, rather than being published with no recompense. It is easily the most gripping thing I've ever read on-line, and I will snap up at least four or five copies of the resulting book, myself, if it ever hits the shelves.

I wish I were a publisher. If I was, I'd make her an offer NOW. Or, if I were a literary agent - or knew what it takes to become one - I would sign her up quick, fast, and in a hurry. We would both make a million dollars.

Nope. That's a lie. I'd make a million. She'd make ten million. Her story is that good. I'm deadly serious.

If this stuff isn't a best-seller waiting to happen - one that will be snapped up in a heartbeat for movie rights - you can call me One-Ball Jim because I'll eat my left nut. Fame is ready for Crystal McKee. Oprah will have a seat with her name on it, as soon as Oprah reads this thing. I have never been surer of anything in my life.

There is a big old pot of gold waiting at the end of Crystal McKee's rainbow. There is also a pot of gold waiting at the end of someone else's rainbow. I wish it was my rainbow, but I don't have the knowledge or skills to make it happen. How about you? How about someone you know?

You'll find the first chapter HERE. Here's CHAPTER TWO. You'll find the rest of the chapters yourself. I guarantee it.

Soon, with more better stuff - but not as good as what I just told you about.


Rooster said...


You weren't very clear - did you like it or not? ;-)

I'll give it a read, but unfortunately, if you put both of our abilities together to help, you'd be multiplying zero by zero. Not sure what that equals, but it can't be much more than one, can it?

Suldog said...


One thing I should have said, but didn't, is that you (or others) may have a reader who can help, even if you can't. So, feel free to direct others there - if that's something within the purview of your own blog, of course.

Sharfa said...

I luv Crystal and you are 100% right on all accounts.

Her life seems to have been a train wreck you can't keep your eyes off of and yet she has risen above all of it and maintained that sardonic wit. Incredible and once you start reading - you cannot stop.

Janet said...

I can edit it! OF course, it probably doesn't need it. Can't wait to start reading and I'll post it on my blog too. I know some writer types who know some publisher types.

Janet said...

My God. I just read all 20 chapters. My children ate string cheese for lunch - I ate nothing so I could finish. I feel like I've walked out of a movie in the middle. That dear amazing child. Obviously it turned out well because she has her son back, but I'm almost afraid to read the rest of that story. Although truth be told, I could have written some of it. Not nearly as well.

Suldog said...

Did I tell you? Amazing stuff. I wish I had had all 20 chapters to devour in one sitting. I've been reading them one every day or two or three, when she posts, and sitting on pins and needles waiting for the next one. I'm going batty waiting for Chapter 21 right now.

Hilary said...

From what I understand, the folks over at offer the best free advice on all aspects of writing. She might want to check that out. I'm told it's a goldmine for would-be writers as well as published writers. They'll warn of pitfalls, dishonest schemes and advise just what you need to know. There's a LOT of reading on their forums, but well worth the effort to do it right.

CSD Faux Finishing said...

You are so not wrong, she is an amazing writer. I have read the first 5 parts so far but definitely need a break, it is heavy stuff. Thanks for sharing her!

Suldog said...


Thanks for the advice and for the approbation!

She's really something, isn't she?

Rooster said...


I finished the first 5 chapters - amazing stuff.

I have a friend who has a blog dedicated to writing and developing writing careers. Might be helpful?

The Writer's Group

John-Michael said...

I started reading her work some time back (from your side-bar) and was (quite honestly) overwhelmed with the raw power of her intensely genuine writing. Had to surrender to my emotional limitations. (The old PTSD kicked in real good! Took several days to chill back out. She is THAT good.)

I love Your Heart in pursuing some appropriate outlet for her enormous skill. You are doing the absolute RIGHT thing.

BurningSky said...

I've been reading Boobs, Injuries, and Dr. Pepper for a good six months now. I started reading her Crazy Chronicles, which inspired my College Chronicles, but after chapter 7, I buggered off to Europe and lost track. Is the second half as good as the first..?

Neponset River Bridge Dig said...

thanks for the link -some good writing there for sure. I will check in on this one from time to time.