Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Dear Poochie



You all know Dear Abby, right? Or perhaps you're more familiar with her counterpart, Ann Landers? They offered advice concerning problems confided by readers. Generally, the advice was of a common sense nature, helpful in making a solution clearer or more easily reached. And both women became fabulously well-to-do as a result.

I'd like to do that. That is, I'd like to become fabulously well-to-do. As for offering helpful advice, does my track record indicate an even a remote possibility of doing so? No. However, even a blind squirrel finds an acorn now and again (if he doesn't get run over first) so anything's possible.

What I'm getting at here, via the same torturous route I'll be taking in replying to your missives, is that I want you to write me with your problems and dilemmas; maybe even a conundrum or two. I will, in turn, offer you my best advice, answer, kick in the ass, or whatever else seems appropriate.

Write to me at Suldog@aol.com, or - if you're so much of a lazy sot that you can't be bothered with the tedium of going all the way to your e-mail - put your question in the comments section. All questions, requests for advice, and other annoyances, received by 5pm EST on Friday, will be given an answer in this space on Monday.

(You really should ask me for advice on something. It's the most fun you're likely to get out of this space before Monday, as I'll be re-running another piece I've already re-run three times come Friday.)

Soon, with... well, that's sort of up to you now, isn't it?


29 comments:

Michelle H. said...

You do realize you opened Pandora's box wide with this, right?

(No that's not my actual question/dilemma/conundrum. I'll email my question. BWA-HA-HA-HA!)

Cricket said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cricket said...

Oh, boy... free advice. This promises to be interesting, far better than Ask Dr. Lovemonkey from the Phoenix who, as I'm sure you know, dispenses, albeit wryly, fairly normal advice. I'll be looking forward to it ;-)

First, you shave the gerbil, then you roll it in cocaine...

i beati said...

how did you meet and fall in love with that Saint of a woman?- your wife

Eva Gallant said...

Advice from Suldog....humm. Sounds a little scary!

Jazz said...

My request for advice has been sent.

slommler said...

How does one get into the habit of exercising on a regular basis? An exercise wanna be wants to know.
Hugs
SueAnn

IT said...

Can o' worms, it is. You've gone and opened a big can. Min is on the way, too.
You realize, of course, that if you don't handle this in the proper manner, some clown is probably gonna give you another award. Not me... I've given you your chance. But there's bound to be some idiot who will think you are doing the world a service.

~jill said...

oh....this is not going to be pretty, but it will probably be worth reading.

Pat - Arkansas said...

Dear Poochie

I once had a dog named Poochie; Daddy shot it because it bit the neighbor's son. Daddy's long, long gone, so you're safe -- from him, at least.

I await Monday's post with bated breath.

TechnoBabe said...

Okey dokey, the questions on the way to your email. We do have unlimited question rights, yes???

Daryl said...

I love it .. ask me for advice or else I will repost old posts .. from almost any other blogger this would be a powerful threat provoking much fear .. from you: not so much

Did you know Ann and her sister were twins who didnt get along? Yup.

Sniffles and Smiles said...

Oh...you are brave...very, very brave! Or is the reader brave? Who knows what kind of answers will be hurled our way!...LOL...This is going to be incredibly fun!!! Can't wait! What a fabulous idea! Can't think of any questions right off...but will give it some thought! Hugs, Janine

jinksy said...

Advice, you say? This will need some serious consideration - I will delve into my psyche, and see what comes up - later....

Ananda girl said...

Oooohhhh... what fun! I'll ponder my poser and send it to you for postulation! Hee hee

Buck said...

Well, I'm tempted to ask about my drinking problem. Except that it's not a problem. At all. Except perhaps for those rare occasions when we run out of beer. Which hasn't happened in the last ten years or so. So: NO problem!

Joan said...

I can't wait to read on Monday. :) You are brave.

She Writes said...

I am DYING to hear this!

Jeni said...

OMG! My comments tend to be so long, rambling, disjointed now, can you imagine the book that would be on your blog if I responded to your request? You'd never survive the ordeal my good man!
Besides, many of us already blog about our problems, put our questions out there, so you can just go through and pull your questions to be answered via that medium I'm thinking.

Carolina said...

This is officially the first time I've sincerely wanted to have a problem of some sort or size. Unfortunately I'm currently going through a problemless phase.
So I will have to make do with reading about problems of others and your, no doubt very creative, solutions to them.
Looking forward to that!

Wish you a wonderful Easter holiday.

Uncle Skip, said...

I was seriously thinking about taking advantage of this offer. It really sounds great. Then it dawned on me who it is that's making the offer and concluded that I may as well be asking where I can find kosher ham.
BTW - don you know where I can find kosher hame?

Uncle Skip, said...

Ham... dammit!

Chris Stone said...

Dear Poochie, I've been thinking on this and since you have already covered how to become a millionaire, not sure what else to ask. ;)

lime said...

ooooh i can hardly wait!

Ruth and Glen said...

A question is on its way to your email. Oh boy, this should be interesting on Monday! :o)

Jenn said...

Awesome! Can't wait to read along with all the fun that will surely ensue from this big old can of worms :-)

Matt Conlon said...

"Suldog: There's an Ant in my Dishwasher... What should I do!?"

Matt Conlon said...

It's a shame we don't occupy an adjacent space... I'd think something like emailing you for advice wouldn't be as funny as walking over and saying "Hey, smell this... Do I need a shower?"

Janet said...

*sigh*
The things I've missed in the last couple of months.