Monday, October 06, 2008

Self-Portraits Of The World's Nicest People

This is MY WIFE. Yes, apparently I married a toilet brush.

I asked MY WIFE to contribute a drawing to this collection and that's what she drew. I think she was having some self-image issues this weekend. She said her hair looked like it belonged on a scrub brush, so that's why she drew herself that way.

I told her that I didn't want to publish a sketch of a toilet scrubber that supposedly resembled MY WIFE. I said that I wanted a picture of her as she really looks. So, she drew me this:

Yup. She morphed herself from a toilet brush into a mushroom.

Now, you've got to understand something. I am one sucky artist. All weekend I was attempting to do a drawing of myself. As I'd complete one that I thought might resemble me, I'd bring it to MY WIFE for a critique. Every time I did so, she said it didn't look like me. So, I'd go off and try again. And again. And yet again. All in all, I probably did about thirty sketches of myself.

After she drew herself as a mushroom, I decided that her critiques no longer counted. Whatever I thought might look like me was good enough. I mean, am I going to ask a beautiful woman who feels that she resembles a toilet brush her opinion on my artwork? Hell, no. So, she hasn't seen this one yet.
I think I've captured my essence.

(Even if it doesn't look like me, it looks one hell of a lot more like me than her self-portrait looks like her.)

Meanwhile, here are some drawings that I'm sure look exactly like the people they purport to be.

This is the lovely Sandra Ree.

This is Chris Stone, ice skating.

The above were done by Kevin Smith, of The Angry Fan. Going way beyond the call of duty, he drew himself in the style of five different comic artists. The one in the lower right is his own style. Bravo! Magnificent!

This is My Mom, with her pet cat, Smoky. Interesting choice. She drew Smoky with her, rather than my Stepfather, Bill. Considering how Smoky turned out, this may have been a break for Bill.

This is my friend, Michelle, who calls herself The Surly Writer. That's a lie. She's a sweetie.

This is Hilary, from The Smitten Image. It certainly is.

This is Fat, Frumpy & Fifty. That's what she calls herself. Doesn't look it to me.

This is Chuck. He Simpsonized himself. So did The Beautiful (Yet Surprisingly Inexpensive) Tara, who appears below. I couldn't figure out how to save Tara's picture from the website, so I had to print it out and then scan it, thus the graininess and no color. In addition, it looks as though she has a black eye, which was NOT the case in the original. She looks like she came from trying out for a part in A Clockwork Orange. Trust me on this: She looks much better in person and in color.

This is the lovely Jenn, from Random Lunacy.

This is Janet from Adventures In The 32-Aker Wood. Her blog being named as it is, I was expecting something a bit more like Winnie-The-Pooh, but what do I know? MY WIFE looks like a toilet brush.

Below we have Lime, in two poses. One of them is NUDE! Woo-Hoo!

Well, according to her, she sleeps in the nude, so under the covers, she is.

I think these are all wonderful (even the "Simpsonized" folks, who sort-of cheated.) I am extremely grateful for the time each of these folks took from their day to work on these portraits.

I said that there would be prizes. I wasn't kidding. Everybody who sent me a portrait gets a $10 gift certificate from Amazon. It pays to be nice! You should all be receiving them, via your e-mail, sometime today.

Thank you, all. I would say, "Soon, with more better stuff", but that would be a lie. It hardly ever gets any better than this.


lime said...

holy cow, you've got some very artistically talented contributors! i wonder if i can buy an art lesson with my amazon gift card. i think i need it.

your wife's renderings are fun! your caricature is terrific. and i just love michelle's and hillary's contributions. bravo, all.

and thanks for the lovely surprise of the gift card. i never would have imagined!

Hilary said...

Aww that was fun! And I'm glad I got to see this post before heading up to the cottage for a week.

Sully that you SO much for your very generous gift.. that was so sweet of you.

You have some fine artists.. particularly YOUR WIFE. I love her sense of humor.. she's a real fungi, married to a real fun guy. And your own drawing did indeed capture a likeness of yourself.

Great, entertaining post. Thank you! :)

PS. I cheated a bit too. I can't draw hands no matter how hard I try.. I traced those from a Google image and then drew in the rest around them.

Tara said...

Thank you for the card and allowing me to participate as mine picture was somewhat of a cheat.

I really loved the "peep a boo" drawing and of course my black eye :) There are some very talented artists out there including you. Thanks for sharing!

Fat, frumpy and fifty... said...

This was fun to particiapte in, but Sol when yous aid prizes me thought you menat another doggie really really shouldnt spend you $$$$ I feelt hat is too generous.....really it is.

Sandra Ree said...

Your wife is a hoot, Suldog! I know I've said that before, but it's true. And so is your mother! Loved your drawing too, I see that you signed it. lol

I actually got a kick out of all the drawings, this was fun! :D

Chris, I couldn't stop smiling at yours!

And I definitely cheated, a little birdie told me when I was whining about not being able to draw worth a darn to pull up a pic of yourself on the computer, tape a piece of paper to the monitor and trace away. You should try it, it gives you an airbrushed look. I left out all the wrinkles and the grey hair. lol

You are far too generous with the gift really are a sweetie. :)

mlh said...

Hee-hee! Your wife is funny, Suldog. And thanks for the card. I would have sent the pic anyway.

Got 2 Trot Librarian said...

great post! I tried drawing myself a couple of times, but it was a disaster!

Nana Net said...

I about choked on my coffee while reading your comments on your wife's drawing! LOL I started laughing so hard it brought tears to my eyes. Just from reading this here I truly can tell you are a shiny diamond! (Plus the other writings of yours I have started to read)

Must say all of these drawings are wonderful. And the people who drew them are very talented individuals. Way to go everyone!

Thank you so much for the much needed laugh today. Take care and I will be back for more laughter!

Nana Net

Anonymous said...

That second picture YOUR WIFE drew wasn't HER! It was supposed to be you! It's a FUNGI... get it !
HAH! A Fun-guy.. I'm still laughing at my own joke.. how lame is that?!

Kevin Smith said...

Thanks for the gift card!

The pics are great. This was an amusing exercise. Must do things like this more often.

CrazyCath said...

Nope it don't get any better. My favourites have to be Lime's, Hilary's and YOUR WIFE'S. Oh yes. And yours of course. Goes without saying (so I nearly didn't say!)

Sorry I never got around to this. I am a rubbish artist anyway. But thanks for sharing what you got. They are great and you did a great post!

CrazyCath said...

Oh and congrats to everybody! You all deserve an Amazon voucher after all that effort!

Angie Ledbetter said...

All great renderings allowing a pleasant morning blog stroll.

PS. I randomly tagged you at my blog today. ;)

Buck said...

I'll echo Lime... you have VERY talented readers, Jim. I thought of "cheating" and sending a link to the Simpsonized-me but didn't. I probably should have. That would have been better than (a) a stick-figure, which is all my limited talent permits or (b) nothing. You wound up getting (b).

But... I surely enjoyed the output of your other readers! Great good stuff! (And don't call me Shirley!)

Jenn said...

These are all awesome! I am humbled to be included in such a talented group of artists :) Everyone did such an amazing job showing off their skillz in such different ways whether digital or old fashioned pen & paper. Right on everyone!

Jim you really went above & beyond with the gift card, this was just a fun something to do and that was such a sweet surprise. Thank you so very much!

ciara said...

this was fun. i love the artistic nature of everyone. i had wanted to do this, but time got away from me. i do adore your wife's toilet brush rendering. hey, at least she's a slender toilet brush. ha ha

Carol said...

This was such a great idea, Suldog. Each one was better than the one before it! Had I not been at a show, I would have contributed one too!!

Anonymous said...

I can't draw worth a toot, so I didn't even try.

I have mad skillz with a camera and my "digital darkroom", though. I thought about submitting a 'shopped picture, but you said DRAW, so I didn't. And now, you shall never see my lovely pixels... Never!

Oh, all right. Maybe later. If you ask nicely... ;)


This really was a great post - and I loved every picture!

Chuck said...

I think Thimbelle is being too hard on herself. I can't draw well either but it didn't stop me from Simpsonization!

(Actually, I felt kind of guilty not drawing something from scratch, but I thought the Simpsons version of myself turned out really well so I liked sharing it with everyone.)

Thanks for the gift!

Janet said...

I think YOUR WIFE is hilarious. I considered doing Eeyore, but since I already have his lovely behind as my picture on comments, I felt it would be redundant.
And thank you for the lovely Amazon gift card! I shop there all the time.
Thanks, Suldog, this was lots of fun.

Chris Stone said...

lol! fun post! Loved seeing the spectrum of the drawings... what a great idea. and thanks for including my olympic hopeful pose... and thanks also for the generous gift! thought it would be another snazzy super commentator! lol!

Melody said...

What a great idea. I don't know any of the people who drew themselves, but looking at their drawings made me care about them.

Your wife is awesome!

Melody Platz

womaninawindow said...

For real? Dude! I didn't play but this is crazy. Ten bucks each. That's just nuts.

Hilary's was amazing. They were all fun. Your wife's - hilarious! Yours, very respectable.

Jeni said...

Great post and a lot of fun seeing each bloggers concept of themselves in a drawing. My artistic talents, like most other talents I once had, seem to have gone completely down the old drain, therefore, no drawing from me. But you've seen my pic on my blog and that's bad enough to view.
And, on another note, but about you never the less, this week on either the Hallmark channel or TVland, they were showing the beginning episodes of "Cheers" -before Cliff joined the team -and in some group scenes, there was one character there that looked very much like you -based on some old pics you have posted now and then of yourself. Were you once upon a time a member of the "Cheers" people? Probably wasn't filmed in Boston anyway so highly unlikely but just wanted to tell you there's an actor out there somewhere who looks a lot like you -or vice versa.

Anonymous said...

Great idea and fun pics, Suldog, yours made me laugh out loud, if it truly does look like you then I am in love....We all need a guy who can make us laugh.

And you are so well matched by the wit of your wife...funny, lucky lady.

Anonymous said...


Suldog said...

Just a quick answer for Jeni:

No, I was never in "Cheers". However, MY WIFE swears that she's in the opening credits. There's a smallish woman, dressed mostly in white, carrying a suitcase or such, walking by the bar. You can't ever see her face, so we'll never know for sure, but it definitely does look like the rest of her (as she looked in the 80's.) And she did live on Beacon Hill at the time, so...

Craver Vii said...

Great idea; that was good fun!

Sandi McBride said...

Now this is a fun post...yes, really really fun...and everyone is as I imagined them...except for the toilet brush...I imagined her hair a bit curlier...

Mona said...

I bet you are earning all the prize money that you are donating out here, from an exhibition of all the thirty self portraits you did!

GASP! Naked lime! Gosh ! I am reporting porn on your site! ( I kid)

Wifeys self image does need an upliftment. Tell her to get hep & turn into a vacuum cleaner instead! :D

Rich said...

Some fun stuff here,Suldog. I'm sorry I didn't get mine in on time. Oh well.

Janet said...

I have every single episode of Cheers on tape. I'm going to go find them now so I can see your wife live and in person. As opposed to the live and in person pictures of her that grace your blog from time to time. Ignore me, I'm blathering.