Gold was discovered at Sutter's Mill. Penicillin was discovered on moldy bread. Lana Turner was supposedly discovered while sitting on a stool in a drug store.
I will not be found in a mill, on moldy bread, or sitting on a stool at a drug store counter. Instead, you can discover me (appropriately enough) in Discover magazine. Not only will you find me IN the magazine, I am also ON the magazine. For the second month in a row, I am on the cover.
Why, look! There I am now!
No, I'm not the rather fit Asian woman. I am Santa Claus. That is, my story is the one about Santa Claus.
(This represents a slight logistical problem, inasmuch as I am a strict proponent of letting one holiday play out entirely before letting another one appear. But, look again at the photo of the issue in which my Santa story is featured. See what issue it is? That's right - December. And I thank you.)
You should rush out and buy a copy now because you love me.
(Some of you love me because I make you laugh. I admit that my previous appearance in the mag was a bit dry - it's a science magazine, after all, and there are just so many yucks in stuff like quantum physics - but this piece has a higher humor quotient. This is because my good friend, Saint Nick, has a wonderful sense of humor. Also, since what I know about science can fit in a thimble and have room left over for a congressman's sense of propriety, I made stuff up.)
(Don't tell my editor. She thinks the parts about flying reindeer were thoroughly researched.)
So, to reiterate: The December issue of Discover, which is on newsstands now, has me in it; also, Santa Claus. You should buy it. If you don't, you may end up on the naughty list.
Soon, with more better stuff.
