Friday, July 26, 2013


Which, of course, stands for "No Softball Anywhere", because I promised you that and (despite all evidence to the contrary) I am a man of my word. Actually, today it will be two words, followed by some initials.


I have no doubt this will put me on their A list. I hope so. The more I can keep them busy with my bullshit, the safer the rest of you will be from their prying eyes and ears.

So, now that Congress has sold our right to privacy down the river, the feds want to gather up all of our passwords and start checking our e-mail.

If they get my passwords, I'll be glad to let them look at some of my mail. They can handle all of the penis enlargement ads. Of course, those sorts of ads would do the folks at the NSA no good whatsoever. They're already the biggest dicks in the country.

Perhaps they'd like to finance their unconstitutional activities via the many billions of dollars being offered to me by Nigerian lawyers?

Am I being too harsh? Is there a good reason for them to root through my personal thoughts and my private letters and my intimate conversations? Maybe allowing them to do so will avert some sort of terrorist plot. If lives can be saved, I should just shut up and stop being such a wise ass, right?



This country has a Bill Of Rights for a reason. And that reason is the same for every single bit of that document. It is in place and in force to KEEP THE ASSHOLES IN GOVERNMENT FROM INTERFERING WITH OUR PRIVATE LIVES. Every sentence in The Bill Of Rights was put in there for the specific purpose of limiting the powers of the government. If you don't believe that, then you haven't actually read it. For those who doubt, or perhaps need a refresher, here it is, complete and unabridged. Read it that way while you still can (and I'd suggest paying particular attention to Amendments I & IV. Of course, Amendment II is what holds the entire thing together; without it, we rely on the good faith of those in power.)

Before you read, though, I'd like to make a suggestion. If you believe as I do - that the government is far overstepping its bounds these days - how about letting them know how you feel? Write something similar to this, for instance, and post it, then ask all of your friends to do the same. Or do something truly fun, such as answering your phone with "Hello! If the NSA is listening, Fuck You!" Or maybe just forward all of your junk e-mail to the government and see how long it takes before some goons with guns come to your door.

We're truly approaching the edge of the cliff, folks, and we're being pushed there. If we don't start pushing back, you know where we're headed.

Soon, but I guarantee nothing.


Amendment I

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

Amendment II

A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

Amendment III

No Soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the Owner, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law.

Amendment IV

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

Amendment V

No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offence to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.

Amendment VI

In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the State and district wherein the crime shall have been committed, which district shall have been previously ascertained by law, and to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the Assistance of Counsel for his defence.

Amendment VII

In Suits at common law, where the value in controversy shall exceed twenty dollars, the right of trial by jury shall be preserved, and no fact tried by a jury, shall be otherwise re-examined in any Court of the United States, than according to the rules of the common law.

Amendment VIII

Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted.

Amendment IX

The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.

Amendment X

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.


(not necessarily your) Uncle Skip, said...

I wondered what I was going to post this morning.

The Geezers said...

Initially I was a little offended by all this. But then I got a little ho-hum about it all, recognizing that the government is far too incompetent to really be much of a danger with this information.

Buck said...

I'm deeply conflicted over this issue. The final two paragraphs of your first linked item state:

The White House was supported by several senior members of Congress, including the Republican chairs of the Intelligence and Armed Services committees who had written a letter urging colleagues to reject the amendment.

"While many members have legitimate questions about the NSA metadata programme, including whether there are sufficient protections for Americans' civil liberties, eliminating this programme altogether without careful deliberation would not reflect our duty, under Article I of the Constitution, to provide for the common defence," the chairmen warned.

I would tend to agree with the two chairmen on this issue. The proposed amendment just MIGHT have been too hastily written without due consideration for intelligence objectives. Unlimited monitoring without supervision is unacceptable, NO monitoring at all is also unacceptable. More work is required here.

(not necessarily your) Uncle Skip, said...

Of course I didn't bother to read either of the linked articles.
Heck, barely read your description.

I'm thinking the folks we have in the Senate and the House are so inept, incompetent, insincere, and inferior that they have to pass legislation proposed by others before they will even read it.

IT (aka Ivan Toblog) said...

I like number ten, particularly the part about parts being reserved to the people.
What I don't like is the idea that the feds are talking out of both sides of their collective mouth.
Or, as it were, giving with one hand while taking with the other.
The proposition that minority rights are being protected.
But the collective rights of everyone are disappearing.

OldAFSarge said...

I think, it's sad to admit, the US government is broken. No branch is doing their job, the Executive, the Legislative and the Judicial are all broken and are led by mental midgets. Where are the real Americans? The ones who know you have to work for a living, that if you screw something up, then HELLO, it's probably your own damn fault, not the government's. (For if they screwed it up you would truly be irreversably screwed.)

It's time.


Lil said...

Well, since I'm not American, I'm not sure whether I can really weigh in on the situation. However, since Canada usually follows in the US footsteps, and since Stephen Harper is an asshole, I'm sure the same thing is going on here (though it has yet to be brought to the public eye).

And any way you cut it, it is WRONG.

Stephen Hayes said...

It's been a while since I read the Bill of Rights. Thanks for the refresher.

Sandy Kessler said...

There is way more wrong than right with this country right now .I feel independence has left us //I do have faith though..But it is hard.really hard.ALL THE THINGS I BELieVEED IN AS A CHILD WOW sEEMS WE REWARD THOSE WHO DO NOT WORK IN THIS COUNTRY AND WHEN Was the last president who talked about a court case?This is second time first was beer summit in Boston..ugh sigh sigh What rights?

messymimi said...

Sometimes i just think, "Well, it was a nice experiment while it lasted..."

SueAnn Lommler said...

This truly makes one think....what the hell are they doing???? They couldn't find a pair of socks to match...let alone decipher our info!!! Ridiculous!!!
An abomination!!
Hugging you from under my covers

Lowandslow said...

I have serious problems with many things our government is doing these days. NSA-gate is just one. The worst part is, "we the people" aren't going to do anything. As long as the mortgage is paid, we have a nice car, and we have a few bucks in the bank, nobody cares what the government does, at least not enough to DO anything about it. We'll just be happy little slugs in our own little compost pile.

Anonymous said...

Amen, amen, amen, and AMEN! I'd rather die from a terrorist attack, freedoms intact, than live till I'm old and gray totally controlled and regulated and enslaved by the government.You say it much better than I do, so I'm going to just re-post yours. Thank you!

Babs said...

Our government is pathetic, pres included..and everything in the news is a smokescreen for the devious acts they are doing to mislead us.

Yogi♪♪♪ said...

Amen, I'm not much of a Tea Partier but I think the Feds are way overstepping their bounds. And why does a free country need Secret Courts anyway?

Jackie said...

I've been trying to think of a way to simplify the Bill of Rights.
(OK. I'm simple minded.)
Thanks for posting them here. It has been too long since I've read them.
My simplification is as follows: (Jackie's abridged interpretation only...nothing more, nothing less.)
1st Amendment - Sully can cuss if he wants to. No jail time for that.
2nd Amendment - Jim can have a gun.
3rd Amendment - Jim and his Dear Wife don't have to house no Army, Air Force, Navy or Marine folks in their home (unless they wanna.) (Pardon that double negative....just felt right!)
4th Amendment - Sully's softball statistics are safe in his dresser drawer.
5th Amendment - A Grand Jury must say that Jim might have killed someone before they can drag his butt to "real" court for trial. (I was privileged to be a Grand Juror. So blessed to have served. Really.)
6th Amendment - When and if Sully goes to "real" court, he has to get in and out of there pretty quickly, and some poor lawyer is gonna have to take up for him.
7th Amendment - If Jackie owes Sully $20.01, and I say I don't owe him a dime, we are going to court.
8th Amendment - Jackie can't be put to death for owing $20.01 to Sully.
9th Amendment - Jackie and Sully have other rights other than the ones mentioned in 1-8 above. They shouldn't be denied us just 'cause they aren't spelled out in 1-8.
(I copied and pasted (below) this 'explanation' of the 9th Amendment. Anyone agree that this is a little hard to interpret?
"The Ninth Amendment explicitly bars denial of unenumerated rights if the denial is based on the enumeration of certain rights in the Constitution, but this amendment does not explicitly bar denial of unenumerated rights if the denial is based on the enumeration of certain powers in the Constitution." ~United Public Workers v. Mitchell, 330 U.S. 75 (1947). See also Jenkins v. Commissioner of Internal Revenue, 483 F.3d 90 (2d Cir 2007).
Even if mine is off based, it's much easier to understand!! :))
Good grief!! Where was I?
10th Amendment - Massachusetts and Georgia (and the good folks living within those states) along with 48 other states have the power to govern ourselves...unless the United States Constitution has forbidden such a power.
Like I said, Jim, I may be way off in my "interpretation(s)" but after reading so much verbiage "explaining" the Bill of Rights, I think I'll keep mine...for a while.
I had fun. Hope I didn't stomp on these Rights. I cherish them. I honestly do.

Suldog said...

I think you've hit them on the head, Jackie. You certainly did a better job of it than the justice who wrote that opinion on the 9th. Good grief.

Jackie said...


Absolut Ruiness said...

You and anybody who objects to the government snooping in their armpits is right to do so. Terrorism cannot be stopped by going through everybody's mail and phone calls. Somebody who wants to blow up a bunch of people will not discuss it at length on a phone call or cc a mail to all concerned anyways. Competent people will be required to go through ALL that data and deduce possible attacks. I don't think that this is possible with the kind of government servants we have (be it India or U.S.of A). Governments all over the world should try to lose the rhetoric and get to the root cause of this madness. I don't think its just religion anymore. "If the NSA (I don't think we have an Indian counter-part) is reading, Fuck You!"

Observational Cleary said...

Hear, hear. (I don't mind the dirty words - they too kick out our deepest demons.)

While not being extremely paranoid about what the government is doing, using terrorism as a cover for snooping around is a little bit off-putting. If they want my baby pictures, my Excel spreadsheets, and my 9th grade report card with the single "F" in Algebra II, have at it. Just don't tell me I can't criticize my government (I), I can't possess the ability to defend myself (II), I can't refuse the right to have soldiers in my house (III), I can refuse unreasonable search and seizure (IV), I must incriminate myself (V), I can be held indefinitely without trial (VI), not have a trial by jury (VII), be subject to torture (VIII), have laws rigged against me and favor others (IX) and or be told, "You're innocent here, but hard cheese, the government overrules" (X).

lime said...

allow me to join the chorus...


seriously, it's indefensible.

Anonymous said...


And here I thought of trying to get a job with the NSA.


That sounds PERFECT for me.

Sorry, I couldn't resist. You do bring up many salient points and I enjoyed rereading the Bill of rights. It's been too long. Way too long.